At 10:30AM exactly six months ago, we were sitting in the waiting room of the hospital, waiting to be called in for the ultrasound.
At 10:30AM exactly six months ago, we were giddy and nervous at the same time. Were we having twins, and didn't know it? Why was I measuring so big?
At 10:30AM exactly six months ago, we agonized over whether or not we should find out our baby's gender, despite having waiting this long.
At 10:30AM exactly six months ago, I wouldn't have thought that this would be our baby's birthday.
At 10:30AM exactly six months ago, we had no idea that our world would come crashing down, and life would never be the same.
At 10:30AM (or shortly after,) we got the worst news possible.
This baby, who I felt moving inside of me, was going to DIE???! Oh no... No, no, no. But I feel her MOVING. This is not making sense!
I cried, I screamed, I shook.
There are no words to describe my fear and confusion at that moment when the words 'incompatible with life' were spoken from the doctor's mouth.
And then a little while later, we met our baby girl for the first time.
I wish I remembered seeing her for the first time. I was so out of it that I don't remember anything from that first day.
but most of all, I wish she was here with us as we celebrated her turning six months old.
Six months...!!? Half a year???? It feels like yesterday....
Friday, September 25, 2009
And then my head was spinning...
Posted by lost--for--words at 8:16 AM
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Hugs for you is all I have as i dont have the right words. I am so sorry for your loss.
I'm remembering Freja with you as you mark these 6 months. It's been 5 months today since I said goodbye to Lachlan, and I also don't understand how so much time could have gone by. It's gone by so slowly, and quickly, all at the same time. I'm so sorry your sweet Freja isn't nestled in your arms right now.
Remembering your sweet Freja with you as you mark her six month birthday. None of this is as it should be. I am so, so sorry.
I thought of you on Freja's 6 month birthday. You never forget the moment your life changed.....getting that news. I wish you could remember those first moments and most of all I she were here.
I remember screaming "no, no, no" too. I wish you were celebrating all the milestones a six month old should be celebrating. I am so sad and sorry that you're not.
Post a Comment