A Gift to Him, From the Grief

Last summer, only a couple of months into the fresh loss of my daughter, I wrote in this blog post about going into a store and being drawn to the baby section where I happened upon a rattle that I just had to have. At the time, I thought it was irrational of me to buy since my daughter wasn't alive to play with it, but at the same time I longed desperately for a baby who would someday enjoy it. I ended up buying it and it became my talisman of sorts; A symbol of hope for the future that we would one day be able to give life to Freja's little brother or sister and he or she would be healthy enough to come home. I carried this little rattle around in my purse for the longest time, and eventually retired it to a shelf where it sat for months by itself waiting for a little someone who would fill my arms, bring a smile back to my face, and help heal my shattered soul.

I'm happy to announce that the rattle has finally met it's new owner:




Another bittersweet (yet incredibly joyous!) moment of coming full circle.